Saturday, April 6, 2002

Work And Play

Today I feel like a broken man.

I tend to give myself completely over to my work. I get lost in it, and it begins to fill my mind and my person. It crowds everything else out. I've been pushed to the edge of my ability these last few weeks. It's been a brutal term.

Today I stood alone in my home with no restrictions on my time. All projects completed. All obligations met. Alone.

I have forgotten how to live.

Work has been at the front of my mind so long (years now) that I have forgotten how to live. It's easy to live when driven by need. The need to meet a deadline. Life becomes simple: when is the deadline; what is required; how can I meet these requirements; act. But when the struggle is removed, what then? If there is no deadline, if there is no demand on my person, what then am I to do? It is this question that I have lost the ability to answer.

Got to change that.

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